Ten Year Challenge

I'm going to share a little about how I've become to look like what I look like now. It has taken me through a journey and I can not seem to stop. You see I exercise when the rest of the world is probably at home sitting on the couch watching a series on their cable TV. I don't have cable, I know that alone is strange. I do watch TV but I tend to watch movies. I feel like it takes from my time. I have come to use my time differently than what I used to use it. I have a membership to a gym that I do get to use when the weather outside is unbearable. While you are indoors in the warmth of your home I'm outside walking and running two miles up to five times a week. Yes it's cold outside but man I can be covered in sweat. I enjoy the feeling of how my body feels after working out. I don't think I'd ever say that. My sister told me the other day that she went out in the cold to do something similar as my workout and told me she didn't know how I do it. Don't get me wrong sometimes when I exercise I cry. I cry out of anger of pushing my body to work harder. I cry because I realized that I have to work harder to get at my goal. I cry because I think about the words used towards me. I cry because sometimes my body gets tired but I know I can not give up. So even though I cry it's a good cry because when I look in the mirror I see my results. It's a good cry because I'm wearing clothes I hadn't wore in ten years. I'm close to the weight I was when I graduated high school and some of you know that's a long time for me. I see myself in the mirror and say damn you look good. I pep myself up. I'm at that point now where I'm building what I call soft muscle. Yes the I still want to look like a girl with muscles. In one year I managed to loose weight I'd gained in ten years. I think about it and I still can not believe it. I told myself that I will not ever go back to that person that I was before. I'm still the same being but with a different outlook. I started this journey when I fell but I got back up slowly. I've managed to stay up and keep going. I keep seeing this ten year challenge on social media so I decided to give it a try. Once I put both pictures together I was embarrassed to even share it because I hadn't realized how I had let myself go. I was too comfortable with what I though was okay. But I keep thinking about it and no, I am the change that I needed to be to realize that I could be better. That I fought with myself to be the look that I am now. I can not say I'll stop because it has become a way of life. I am my own motivator. I wore a dress on new years day something I hadn't done in years. Yes I make heads turn. I just keep walking with the confidence that I've help build up. I don't do this alone. As I'm pushing my body to the extreme I ask God to give me the strength I need to not give up. A body is capable of anything and I know I'm capable of anything. If you try hard enough you will see results. I'm a new me. I'm a better version of myself. So while I don't share the times I'm at the gym or the fact that it's fifty degrees outside breaking a sweat just know I will not give up. I will not give up because I'll always remember those harsh words that became my motivation that led to me saying, thank you.

2019 vs 2009