homeless

last year i've heard about volunteering to help feed the homeless. thought about doing it but every time i would see someone on the corner of the street ask for money it just didn't make me want to help. i kept saying why should i have to work to provide for me and my small family. i may not have a fabulous job but i go to work everyday because i know tomorrow will come and i will need a roof over my head, food on my plate, and other necesities that follow. i have to think not about me but my partner and our many four legged babies. so i would get upset and just say no if i can work you can work. i mentioned volunteering to a friend of mine that had extra time on her hands this year and she loved it. she loved it so much that she started getting others involved like me. so i gave it a try. i have to say that i liked it haven't fallen in love with it but 50/50. i was trying to find all the good out of the bad to do this. i honestly don't know how she does it every weekend. i told myself that i will do it at least once a month. who knows maybe more than once a month. i still find more bad then good. one example : the day i met the author of the book i had read at a library in irving tx. i noticed a woman come to the session not to participate in the event but to eat and drink what they had offered that day for the author. what i'm trying to say is that she had spent the whole day at the library instead of trying to do something positive with her life. afterwards she met with another man that had also stayed at the library. i mean what do they do when it closses? where do they go? i also noticed that the library had put locks (master locks) on the toilet paper so that they wouldn't get stolen. how can i feel good about a good deed when all they want to do is wait for others to give them money and food. then i saw a picture going around on the web of a man holding his dog on the street. he held him with such love because they were both homeless and he wanted to cover his dog from the cold. that set me back to maybe this is why i should feel good helping.  i've always been the first to help out be any situation but on this topic i'm going to need some extra thinking to do. so for now it's just once a month till i either feel extra good doing it or it dies out.