to the special guy with the red cap

The one time I enjoy going around the room to hear why we are all thankful for this year. Yes we are thankful all year long for the things life throws at us and for the things that are unexpected. There are reasons why things happen that we will never understand. This year the hot topic was family. What are we thankful for?, family. We never know how long we have each other here on earth.

Write what you are grateful for on the opposite side.

Someone had wrote this on theirs.

It was sweet because we were on a date night.

We live on a hill and cutting the grass is a bummer. We have an ally that also needs the grass to be cut. To get to the ally we would have to go down the street to go behind it because we don't have a gateway access to the back. When Heather would go to cut it she would notice that it didn't need cutting. I wasn't sure why the grass wasn't growing or the fact that it wasn't possible for it to need be cut. I kept saying that maybe someone was cutting it for us. I'd say that with such sarcasm as in a fairy tale world. While heading out this afternoon I noticed someone in the ally. It sounded like someone was setting concrete so I looked out and noticed the top off a cap. I noticed it real close to the fence. I needed to leave the house so I couldn't stop to talk to the person but I did notice what was going on. My speculations were correct. He was cutting the grass in the ally with his weed eater. I thanked God for him. If you only knew how thankful I was for him. He didn't have to cut our grass and I hadn't realized how long he had been doing it. I was wondering how I'd find out which one of our neighbors was doing it. On my way back I drove through the ally and did my investigation. I have ways of coming up with conclusions and found out that not only was he our two houses down neighbor but had also cut our next door neighbors grass. He didn't have to do it but he did. What would cross his mind and heart to take extra time to do so. People don't do things for free anymore. All I could think of was the fact that he did it out of the kindness of his heart. He didn't do it to be acknowledged. He did it without us even finding out and for that I am thankful. Now that I know that he had been doing it I will have to surprise him with a thankful gift. He always waves at us when we see him outside and when we saw him today it was an extra special wave, hello.

People always cross us without us knowing the gestures they do in their life time. Too many thank yous go unsaid.

Who are they?

I woke up to read this story on social media about a person name Rocky that has been a janitor at his school for over thirty years. His dedication to the kids at the school has been appreciated by them. They showed him the same respect as he has towards them.

I call her my mini me because she has the same birth month as me and we both were born with a distinctive native face (head to be exact).

You'd be surprised the important role a janitor has on a child's life. When I was going to my first years of school I didn't have friends. I was and still am a weird child. Back then it was a communication issue. I didn't speak English and no one talked to me so you can imagine how lost I may have looked. There was a janitor at school and I still remember his name, Mr. Cox. he always greeted me, smiled, and made small talk but only so that I could understand him. He didn't know it but he was the only friend I had. I went into the next grade and into the next. I then ended up going to the next school. By that time my little sisters began to go to the same school where Mr. cox worked. I'd meet my sisters and he'd still say hello and he remembered my name. He'd tell me he would always keep an eye out for my sisters as long as he was there. By then my English was getting better. He was always so nice to me and my sisters. He would at times try to communicate with my parents when they had to go to school. By the time I was in high school he no longer worked there. I'd like to think he stayed long enough to see my sisters go through the grades. He never knew how important it was for him to say hello and to be the only friend I had. He was the only adult to take time to ask me how I was doing. Maybe he saw me struggling and on my own.

When you see a janitor or a person of maintenance do you greet them by their name? Do you say hello? They are as important as the person behind a desk. I'll never forget Mr. Cox. I thank him for being him.

I went to my niece's school today to have lunch. I sat in a small orange chair. Good news I didn't break it. I sat next to her with her little friends whispering if I was her mom. She'd whisper back and say I was her aunt. I'd hate to ever hear she had been bullied. Times have changed for the better. Here I was having lunch with her surrounded by little friends able to communicate with them while I, at her age, didn't know how to say what I wanted to eat. I loved the experience I had with her. It was my first and it wont be the last.

After watching and reading the story of Mr. Rocky, it reminded me of how important someone with his title can be to the people that know him.

 

spicy or regular ketchup

Having lunch with my dad today like a normal Monday. My way of getting him out of the house and talking. We mainly talk about politics and what is new with the family. How he is feeling? There was a line to order, so I told my dad to have a seat as I waited for my turn. I spotted a particular young individual calling out the numbers and asking people if they wanted spicy or regular ketchup. Some couldn't make out what he was asking but some did. The person in front of me told the cashier how good it was that they had hired him. It really gave us a sense of appreciation for the place. I sat down and told my dad if he had spotted the same particular young individual? He said yes. We all need a job. I told him that if he was able to get one there was no excuse for the people that don't look for one. He called out our number, came to us, and asked if we wanted regular or spicy ketchup. He was so polite. You could hear his fellow associates giving him praise for how good he was working. I heard his manager tell him he wished the rest of his crew were as dedicated as him. No one complained but I was ready to make my stand if someone had a problem with it.

All I could think about was Trevor, and how it would be cool if he had a job. He wants to feel needed. He wants to work. He wants to feel as normal as anyone else. How I wished and hoped that he would get that chance.

We happened to get some good news today. How crazy the world works. How earlier today I was thinking about him having the same opportunities and now to find out he will soon be starting his new job. Heather talked to her mom today and heard the good news. Trevor will be not only in his senior year of high school but also a young special needs guy with a job. So happy to hear that he has been given this opportunity. Can't wait to hear his stories. I'm pretty sure his work stories will be much better than mine. Love the way God hears us even when we don't expect it.

a postcard and one year later a scar.

I was thinking how time catches up with you. Heather's mom came to visit us this past week, exactly a year ago Heather was with them in Missouri. She was there for Trevor's heart surgery. A very intense time in our lives. It was time to update Trevor's heart and it was important that Heather be there with him and their mom. I didn't go. I'd be in the way and might have made things worse.

I stayed home what would be a week and a half. I didn't tell anyone that I'd be alone in my house.  I actually enjoyed it for the beginning of the first two days. Went to work and came home. No one but me and the four legged babies. Then it hit me. I really felt alone. I'd never felt this way. Not only did I feel alone but life happened. By the end of the week I felt like having an emotional break down. I don't recall having the time to ever have an emotional breakdown but I was trying to find peace in my life and it was hard for that to happen. In this short time my sister Monica was in a terrible accident. She was able to walk away from the accident in spite of the car being totaled. I'd watch my sister cry hysterically as I tried to comfort her. I thank God that she was okay. The frustrating part was trying to find her racing to get to her without knowing if she was okay and not knowing her exact location. Her phone was damaged in the wreck so she had been using strangers phone to try to get a hold of us, me.

I also took a friend to the hospital. As I was leaving work one day someone stopped me and told me that a fellow coworker, friend was in massive pain without knowing what was causing it. I rushed her to the emergency room at Baylor, when I found her sitting at work crying from the pain I knew I had to take her to the hospital. I was there with her for hours. I don't regret being with her until I knew that she was going to be okay but was also worried for my little ones at home. It was coming up to eight in the evening and I hadn't made it home from leaving in the morning for work. As soon as she got a hold of someone to be with her, I left her. I had been with her for four hours and I was just exhausted. Other things were going on with family that was becoming hard for me to deal with. I still didn't want or felt like I needed help.

loves pizza

I ended feeling horrible and selfish. I'd always had Heather by my side. She'd always been my back up for help physically and emotionally. I felt bad for not having her here with me. Her brother was recovering from heart surgery and all I could think about was why she wasn't here with me. I understood that she needed to be there. Trevor is an important person in our lives. By the end of the week I finally couldn't take the stress and just about gave up on everything. I remember it was heading towards ten at night when I stopped to get gas. it was late dark and I was mad that I was running on empty and even this had bothered me. I got out to come around my car to pump gas when I young female started to approached me. I said " God, I'm sorry but if she asks me for money I'm going to go off on her". As she walks towards me I began to get angry. I hadn't had rest from work, family and now friends that were sick. I was upset that I had worked plus dealt with other obligations in my life that if she asked me for money I was going to just give her a piece of my mind. She said "hello" can I give you something?" I was confused and said "okay".  She handed me a postcard. She told me that I was welcomed to come visit her church. Thanked me and walked away. I got back in my car and burst into a mass crying hysteria. My car was still parked and I just sat there in tears. I read this as God sending me a message that he was still here. That even though I felt alone he was still with me watching me. That night I was able to finally sleep. Two days later I picked Heather up from the airport. One year later Trevor was sitting in our living room showing me his heart surgery scar.

I've always been the tough one. The one that can't feel weakness. The one that is always there when I'm needed. When I felt alone against the world, God found ways to tell me "I'm still here"

enjoy your 240th birthday.

The dreaded month awaits me. I despise you, July. With the exception of it being the United States birthday you are just a horrible month. My little big headed niece turns four this year. She is a July baby but she couldn't have been a Leo she had to be a crazy Cancer. 

We had already celebrated on Thursday and Sunday. We tried treating it like when humans take the whole weekend to celebrate a birthday. Come Monday we still hadn't seen fireworks. We decided to drive to Denton by going to a bookstore and partake in their 20% off their entire store. Yeah this is how we were going to celebrate it. Us nerds going to the bookstore for a birthday celebration. One of the things that bring me joy in this world is sitting in the passenger seat listening to music and driving a distance. It's like getting away. Denton from our house is about an hour. Our spending money goes to gas.

On our way we saw a billboard where Lake Dallas was going to celebrate their fourth of July. We quickly made a u-turn, found a place to park, grabbed our folding chairs, and found us a spot. Always carry chairs in your trunk, a tip from me to you. We have two in my trunk and two in Heather's trunk. For all the randomness in our lives. We walked around. Hadn't eaten and since we decided to stay we grabbed some festival food. Honestly we don't really get a bite to eat. We just enjoy all the free falling that we tend to do but since we were going to stay we had tacos, corn in a cup, kettle popcorn, sausage on a stick, brisket sandwich, and some freshly squeezed lemonade. We just pigged out. Right at nine fifteen the candles in the sky lit up. The fireworks lasted for almost twenty five minutes. Nicely done Lake Dallas. Our first birthday experience with Lake Dallas and it won't be our last. We've celebrated in Grapevine, Irving, and Dallas. This has to be my favorite one of all.

It was the experience of going somewhere where no one knew you. Where when it was over we didn't have to be stuck in traffic. These people are really courteous. They know the rule off letting a car in an accordion style. No one honked, they even let us back out of our parking spot. People got up from their chair to dance to the music. No chaos.

Happy 240th birthday America. We don't know how next year will be. Hopefully we can still be able to celebrate you another year older without hate but love. When we all see the big candles go out in the sky we are all just grateful to be able to see it surrounded by all kinds of faces that make us America.

just a plain hello will do.

One day you realize that being alone is the best thing one can be in this world.

I was going through my cell phone photos and came upon one that I hadn't realized I took of myself. I'm assuming I went to put my phone away and as I was doing so realized the application was still up and running. It didn't look posed made me think of how people see me.

Then I realized that I'm alone in this world. Deep down it's hard to talk to someone because there is no one to trust. I find that when someone asks how I'm doing it really is to talk about themselves than really care about my answer. Realized that I'd never had that friend that you can call and they will drop what they are doing to come and hang out just because. I realized that I do better being a loner.

I've always been the one to be there when a friend needed me. They call on Gabriela and sure enough she'd show up. The one that stayed with you at the hospital when your closest friends didn't show up. The one that had the money to bail you out when I was the least person to have called upon. The one that witnessed you become a grandmother for the first time but you chose to drop me to get drunk with people that don't care about you. The less people I know the less problems I make for myself.

Realized that its hard to please the people that surround your life. I don't even try anymore. Hard to trust someone with the smallest secret because one day that person you trusted won't be in your life anymore and now they have that small information that you shared.

I think I reached that point where no matter what is said about or towards me it can't harm me because I've just shut down. I keep to myself. I don't talk to anyone anymore. It's pointless. I just want to be left a lone.

I was helping a man today. He wanted to know why I wasn't showing any emotions. He couldn't understand that I showed no feelings.

I am determined to be that old lady that you see at times that is always by herself. The one you wonder if she has family.

There is this place we like to eat and every time we go we always see a woman of age go and eat by herself. I always wondered if she is lonely. I don't wonder about her anymore.

This isn't a pity cry. It's just don't question why I've become this person.

Just a plain Hello will do.

that one time we went on that hike.

Was looking forward to sleeping in on my Saturday off. Being an adult is hard at times to just stay in bed while the earth just keeps rotating but eventually I have to get up.

On a day like today I look for signs. Wonder if what is needed from me will suffice. Woke up extra early to pass to the donut shop before seven. I was getting some breakfast for when I pick up my niece. We had to be in Lewisville at eight. She was going on a fossil history nature walk. Helping her earn a badge for girl scouts. We don't really bond like when she was much younger. She is growing up and is becoming a young lady. I was reminiscing when I'd pick her up from day care and would put her in the car seat. Now she was riding next to me in the passenger seat. And I was telling her about learning how to drive. The years pass fast when you are old, at least that's how it feels for me. I'm wondering if she liked the fact that I accompanied her instead of her mom. Things I think about that a regular tia wouldn't ask herself. When we were done and heading back all I asked was if she enjoyed herself on the adventures.

I was looking for a sign this morning. A sign that would give me reasoning for waking up early and knowing she'd be okay with me taking her.

When I went to the donut shop this morning I glanced over to my right as I was coming in the door. I saw a woman, a man, and four girls, the oldest was probably ten years old. They were all eating at a round crowded table. When I finally turned to leave with my order all I could hear were bye Daddy's. All four small girls trying to fight over each others words so that Dad could hear them each tell him bye Daddy. He responded with a bye. I looked at them and smiled. He had his work uniform and the girls still had their hair messy from when one walks up. They had all managed to wake up extra early on a Saturday to join their dad to eat donuts before he had to run off to work.

It reminded me of my mom and my sisters at that age. How my mom managed to handle four girls while my dad worked.

This was my sign. At our young age we didn't have a tia to help us. We just had each other. We didn't get to know what extra activities we could do besides trying to drive our mom crazy.

My sister had me to help her. Maybe one day when Gema is older she'll have that story that goes something like this........remember tia that one day we went on that hike and it was really humid?

My sisters and I never had that.

a dead gift

I opened the door this morning and just about had a heart attack.

Heather has been feeding an outdoor cat for over a year. Heather named her Tiny Feet. We also feed her brother. I do tell her not to feed them so that they wont come back but she still does. We already have our own inside kitties so we don't need any more. They are here in the morning and leave during the day and back in the evening. That's when they know they get fed.

A couple of weeks ago Heather started giving her extra food. She claims that she was pregnant. How did she know? She will sometimes sit outside to talk and pet her. Why must I love an animal lover. My dad takes her side on this matter. She was gone for two days and when she was back her belly was smaller which can only mean that she had her baby, or babies.

We began to wonder where she had them. I'd notice that Heather would slow down once we hit our street to see if she would notice little ones in the area.

Yesterday when we came home from work, by the way Happy Mothers Day friends, we saw four little small kitties in our driveway. Heather was screaming with excitement we pulled in slowly and they scrammed. She was so excited to see that she had had four little ones. She went inside and fed the mommy. When she came back in the little ones came back to their mommy and she fed them.

This morning when I went to open the door I freaked. The dogs like to follow me to the door so I panicked and closed the door quickly. There was a squirrel on the porch. A dead one. I immediately texted Heather and told her I freakin had a heart attack. She called me to ask what happened and began laughing when I sent her the photo. I don't think its hilarious. It was a thank you gift from the cat. It was a way of saying thank you for feeding me and my babies. I didn't appreciate the gift. Heather always gives me a gift for mothers day from the fur babies as I do to her as well. I didn't literally want a gift from the fur baby living outside.

the gift

Needless to say I left it on the porch for my Heather.

Then when Heather got home from work she ended taking one of the four babies to the vet. She called to ask me. I couldn't tell her kind heart no. So she took the little one to the vet. The baby had a bloody nose that was causing him to not breath. The vet tended to it free of charge. The little one is back home but please there is a free kitty cat possibly three more if we can catch them too. 

two kitties

I think I would have cried hysterically had she brought me a dead rat.

Another normal crazy day in the neighborhood.    

mad at myself

Have you ever been so mad at yourself for something you did?

I am a procrastinator. Have been all my life. I put things to the last minute. Went down to the tax office to get out of the car to go inside see that the line went out the office door so walked right back out. Didn't have time to stand and wait needed to head over to my parent's house.

After finishing running errands with my dad went back to stand in line. I was the last person when the guy in front of me asked if I could hold his place in line. I don't know why I asked him what he needed to do when he said he had to go to the store next door. I said okay. As soon as I said okay and he walked off I had regreted saying it. The line was extremely long. But I was to blame for waiting to do it. I didn't see him come back so I just wondered if it was my turn and he just decided to wait too long to come back. Then I told myself that I waited in this line for thirty minutes already with the rest of the people waiting for their turn. The line still constantly moving and people had already been lining behind me. Remember I'd been waiting for thirty minutes when I was second to be called. Out of nowhere the guy came up to me to get in line. I was mad. I asked where and what did he do?  And why he was just now coming back. I questioned him as if he was an ignorant person. I was mad. I made him repeat himself three times before I understood him. He went to get a receipt. All I could think was if he had gone and sat down somewhere while I saved his spot standing in line. I was so mad. How was it that he came right in time to be called? I was so mad. I wanted to say I hope we never meet again. I was so mad.

I was mad at myself. I would have never told someone to save my spot, and here I was allowing someone to ask me and I let it happen. I was mad at myself for having my guard down to be nice. I was mad. I'm not nice and he took advantage of the fact that I would say yes. He never once thanked me. And as I write my madness down to tell you, I'm still mad at myself. I can tell myself that I won't let it happen again but it might. I'm not a nice person so he caught me off guard.

I am still mad at myself.

Petty if it be but what made him so special that he didn't have to stand in line?

I am still mad at myself.

losing faith

Some have special little ones in our lives that we call part of the family. We come home and they are the first ones to great us. They get excited just to know we are home.

When we found out Faith was sick we didn't know how long she had with us. We just knew it was a matter of time. We've known her since she was a tiny little thing. You couldn't see her grays you just could see it in her eyes. In the way she moved the way she didn't have the energy to move. I was asked to photograph her before she was ready to leave. I know that at the time I was running on her time. It was the first time I'd photograph a family member with four paws and was nervous doing so. Babies are not photographed on your terms but on theirs. It was more fun for me than for her.

Faith 2005-2016

Now it was just a matter of time before she was to say goodbye. She didn't want to give up but she was also in pain. Talk about stubborn. Four legged beings tend to take after their humans so her being a fighter made since. But knowing that you have a heart means that it is you that has to break down and help and this is the worst part of saying goodbye. Going to the vet one last time of Faith's life will be her last. While the doctor prepares her you think about all the bad things in life she did because of course she is a rebel. And you try to figure all the good things but you cannot because all you think about is the suffering. It's never an easy thing to do. She falls asleep and you wait to see if she'll get back up.

Faith you will be missed but we knew one day you'd leave. The family Sunday night dinners will not be the same without you at our feet. You always had that look on your face like you could do no wrong. Out of all I know Gracie will miss you the most, your sister in crime. Hope that where ever you are you won't haunt the family because knowing how they don't care for the paranormal you would definitely freak them out.

the pursuit of silence

Have you ever enjoyed the silence? I don't mean being alone. I mean the sound of silence. Have you ever sat down at a table, and everyone seems to be on their phone. Have you been home and have the electronic devices off? Do people ever look up anymore.

We lose touch with our surroundings and we forget to enjoy what comes our way. We miss a smile from a stranger. We miss who waved hello on the road. We can not even hear the wind anymore because we have a device planted in our ears.

There are a few people that still want to find the sound of silence. What does this mean? We urge to go on vacation to get away from all the noise that consumes our lives. From a busy work place to how loud a restaurant is that you can not seem to hold a conversation long enough before its over powered by the loudness and how bored you are that you pick up that device to not acknowledge what it is in front of you.

When you choose a destination to feel at ease or restless, is it not the same as what you left back home.

Silence is what will come to exist in the future.

The Pursuit of Silence was recommended to us to watch at the film festival. Now I'm recommending you to watch it. It will open your eyes to the sounds that you can not hear anymore and you'll learn how important it can impact your life.

where I go to find the silence

When I go to the beach once a year it's to get away from the city. To go where no one knows my name. To leave all worries behind. I go when it's not beach season so it won't be so crowded. We go to the tip of the island where I know no one will go. I bring a foldable lawn chair and sit it on the sand. I sit down and stare out at the big endless water and lose my train of thought. Sit there for an hour before I realize thoughts are coming back to me and I start to reevaluate my life. Start acknowledging the waves and the seagulls again. How I've disturbed their daily routine by sitting here. Gathering my chair and heading back realizing that this feeling is therapeutic and won't ever get this way for another year. This is the sound of silence. My pursuit of silence.

Sometimes you have to break from all the noise to appreciate the beauty of silence -Robert Tew

This film is our documentary this year and I gave it a five. Excellent.

This is why the people that live out in the country will live longer, healthier lives than people that live in the city.

I love the city, I live it. I also get lost in the sounds to find the silence in it.

Anti Birth

What were we thinking? It's our ninth year attending the Dallas International Film Festival. You have to love films as much as we do to make an error to watch a midnight screening, at midnight. Our first film this year was Anti Birth. It was a debate over Anti Birth and Dallas Zombie Nation. I would rate Anti Birth fair. When we walked out all I kept thinking was, what in the world did we just watch? Government injecting you with a drug for an experiment without you knowing, to find out that it went too far. Don't trust anyone. Money will buy a person. I kept thinking ,okay it will get better, through out the film. I don't regret watching it. It's a film that no one will probably ever watch. Well maybe the weirdos like us. There are the special weirdos out there that share the same concept and will laugh about watching something like Anti Birth later. As we are driving home I was trying to fight the urge to stay concentrated and alert. We hadn't been out at two in the morning in years, and wondered where my young life had gone. The years keep adding up. I'd been up since five am and it was past two am the next day. We were talking about who would still be up at this time in the morning.

We were talking about it when we hit traffic. Traffic at almost a stand still at two in the morning. All lines joining towards the last right lane on the freeway. We came upon a firetruck blocking the other three lanes and came upon a silver truck turned completely around on the freeway and the whole front end gone, and another Tahoe on a tow truck. Then we analyzed whether it was someone that just came from a club or from work. Prayed for their well being and hoped that this didn't happen for all the wrong reasons.

Anti Birth started at a party and ended with a birth. It's our horror pick this year. A creature feature. The beginning to our long week of films to watch.

Keep weird and unique friends.

red carnations

Got up early to shoot photos of a young couple this morning. Went down to Deep Ellum to do the shoot. Love the many photo ops in Deep Ellum due to the many changing backgrounds. Nothing is ever normal here. Photographers tend to use greenery as backgrounds. For example flowers, woods, botanical gardens. I like the opposite. Yes there are beautiful earthly things but I prefer old buildings, art and architecture as backgrounds.

Three things happened today as we stopped to shoot.

my young couple

One person asked us for donations, monetary donations. We politely declined.

Another person got arrested. As we passed by a women yelled out comments. They were not bad comments but just weird talk to us. We figured she was maybe already drunk while having brunch early Saturday morning. Few minutes later two patrol cars pulled up and arrested her due to not being cooperative. Found out she had been speaking her mind and ran a bill of a little over one hundred dollars without having any funds to pay.

red carnation

As we were finishing the shoot I kept noticing people with a red carnation. The closer we headed back the more and more people I saw. While taking my last photos a gentleman approached us and asked if it was okay to give us some flowers. We looked at each other as if to say does he want something in return. He said he was just passing some out and wanted to know if we would like one. We gladly accepted and he walked away. On the red carnation was a white ribbon with a small scripture written on it. I loved the small act of kindness. It made the whole shooting process that much more memorable.

the scripture

While in Deep Ellum there is never a dull moment. That's what I love about this part of Dallas. I don't know if photographers have this much excitement in their shooting process but I enjoy it. I love what the world throws at my way. Ended using the red carnation in some photos

Some days are just that much better than others. Today was a great day for this photographer.

revenge of the yellow jacket

I came home and was about to open the door when I noticed a yellow jacket on a small nest. I grabbed a stick and knocked its nest down. I couldn't have it that close to the door. I did not want to get stinged, if you know what I mean. I opened to door and went in.

The next day nothing happened. I opened the door and everything was okay.

On the third day I had my left hand occupied with bags from the grocery store so I reached in the mailbox to get the mail. Since my right hand had the keys I tried to tuck the mail under my neck before opening the door. I didn't even get that chance. As soon as I put the mail under my neck I repeatedly said, "something bit me.....something bit me!" Heather came behind me and I let the mail drop to the ground and started to check my neck. When I saw that stupid yellow jacket fly from under the mail. It had been waiting for me in the mailbox. So when I went in for the mail it claimed its revenge. How was I to know that this creature with a sting is smart? It stung and all I could think about was my neck possibly becoming swollen. What was I to do?

right before the paste

Heather immediately went into the kitchen and made a paste with the spices that she had known about before and put in on the sting. I asked her how she knew to do this and she told me that she came upon the recipe for just this particular situation. By the end of the evening my neck was no longer red but a tiny hole was still there. It did itch a little the next day but there wasn't any swelling or redness.

On the fourth day the yellow jacket began to replace the nest and here again is the fifth day. But don't worry revenge of the yellow Jacket isn't over. It has only just begun. Yes it was my first sting and I'm not going to lie I was really concerned. The yellow jacket did get its revenge but I wont let it just fly by.

Lesson learnd here? ......I learned nothing. Well maybe to always look for an avenged yellow jacket. Next time I take the nest down I'll be more ready for that sting.

meaning of their feathers

Sometimes people of different tribes get together and dance. They travel where mother earth needs them to go. This past weekend they came to the Dallas area, Carrolton city to be exact. Tribes from the state of Missouri and Oklahoma came to show us how they celebrate what God blesses us with here on earth. I admire how they keep their tradition strong. How they continue to speak the native tongue. I know that slowly it can disappear, but as long as the elders continue to teach the young, they can still keep it alive. For example, I speak Spanish but generations after me will not know the way of translation and it does bother me. I'd want people to never forget where they came from.

We got to see different types of dances and hear the music that follows the drum beat that makes you feel. Everything worn signifies something, from the color of the dress to the feathers on their heads. I've felt their cries and beats to their music.

On Sunday evenings we listen to 89.3 KNON. Listen to it at 6pm. see if it lets you feel the music. The sounds have often made my cry. It makes me wonder what it was like in that time. When ever the opportunity appears we go to the POW WOW. What is POW WOW, it's a gathering of North American Indians among friends to feast and celebrate by singing and dancing. They do invite you to eat with them. I want to witness in my time the way of the dance. To live it and hope that it won't disappear.

I'm not native, but I do get asked a lot. My fathers mother was a Mexican Indian who fell in love with a German who was orphaned at five years old. I take after my dads side of the family. Ironic when I think about it. The next POW WOW in the area is in September. I encourage you to give it a feel.

Remember the movie Finding Nemo? The movie is being dubbed in Navajo. That should be something interesting and wonderful for the Navajo people. That shows that where ever there is a voice there is a way of communication.

a brown cent #soworthit

How many couples have separate social medias? When I go through mine I don't always have my significant other near me, so when we finally share the things we see its like "did you see?" kind of answer. I saw a video about how valuable a penny is? She was looking at it without hearing it and I already saw it. She didn't want to click on it due to not wanting it to be loud. It's a really nice video that J C Penney made. It has feeling to it. If you have watched it, you will agree that it starts off rewarding, then they get really penny happy and start giving whole living areas. The one that got me in my feels was the one man that picked up the penny to find new appliances when he just had a fire in his home. So as she is going through the video I explain it to her. She doesn't want to get watery eyes like me so she keeps it on silent. We finish watching it together and we are about to leave when I turn around and see a penny on the floor. We've always picked up change because it is just something we do. I turn to tell her "speaking of pennies look what's on the floor?". She picks it up and shows it to me with a smile on her face and I realize it's my birth year. What a coincidence that it happened to be sitting there on the floor for us to find. Little things like this happen in our lives that just bring small moments of, ahhh.

1978

People throw pennies away. If they get change they don't keep them. One cent after one cent adds up. So what if its brown, if Abraham is on it, if five of them only give you a nickel. I bet you only notice that one time when you do need a penny, but because you don't have one, you end up breaking a dollar. Then guess what? You end up with more pennies

Would you pick it up next time? Maybe we'll pick it up and they lead us to a curtain with a big surprise.

will you kaylee?

What are you doing this weekend to celebrate, for some, the most dreaded holiday ever?

When you were in school during your adolescent years, how many had crushes? We all did. I don't care what one says we all had them. Now whether we remember who they were or what they looked like is probably not even worth remembering. I remember having crushes but whether I was brave enough to tell them was another story. The reason for not letting someone know in person is because of the feeling of rejection. So you either tell a friend to find out for you how the person even feels, or you send them a note their way. The feeling of rejection hurts in so many ways and can scar you temporarily, or forever. Some of us are not as strong as others and it can be a longer, bigger scar. Knowing at a young age that being rejected is just one of the many lessons in life and that there is a whole future of world ahead of you, is seldom in a young ones mind and heart.

Went to the grocery store the Thursday before valentines day. Imagine looking at moms while they buy valentine cards for their little ones to take to school the next morning, procrastinators like me. Went with my sweetheart and we did what we had never done before. We each picked out our valentine for each other. I'm like babe I think your valentine will love this and she did the same. Taking the fun out of surprises but it works for us. Especially when we share our money.

While standing in line I glanced over to the candy they purposefully put next to the check out line and saw a piece of paper with a written note on it. I grabbed it to read and it brought back young childhood memories. I brought it home with me. It was my piece of treasure. Thought and wondered how serious the person that was the recipient of the letter actually took it, since it was left as trash. I was hoping that they would have at least read it and not laughed at it for being passed to her. I'd hope that even though she left it as trash or a show and tell that she had the respect to at least answer it. What would you tell your little one had they not received an answer or the fact that you even knew that they had a crush and that their little heart could be hurting.

Happy Valentines Day to all the lovers out their....to the ones that feel love, be it by a mate or the ability to have a friend that cares for them.

I'm taking my love to a heart pumping screaming out loud experience that involves the scary and ghoulish things.

greasing my pants

I've been having the junk yard on my mind for months now. The junk yard, a place known for broken down or wrecked cars, a resting place for cars to be used for parts. Somehow I've been missing it. I remember my dad taking me there as a kid. We couldn't afford new parts for the cars when they broke down so this was like a haven for him to be able to find what could be used. Sometimes my sister would go so she and I would explore, wondering behind him as he looked for what he needed. It's not a safe place for kids to play but I missed the idea of going there with my dad.

When I went over to my parent's today my dad asked if I wanted to go with him to the junk yard, and I said yes. He said, "hope it's okay". I thought to myself why wouldn't it be? I think it's because ladies don't really go to a place like this one. When we arrived all I could think of was how much it had changed since I was a kid. Walking up to it, there was a lady waiting in her car while her man was inside. See what I mean about not being a ladies place to be? It still costs two bucks to get in. You also get your hand stamped and you sign in. Kind of exclusive and fancy, huh?

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We went for two things. A headlight for my mom's suburban and a transmission for my dad's truck. You'd be surprised how many people go for head lights. We were lucky to find one. The transmission was another story. Three hours later and we had the transmission. Heavy thing and all greased up. Having to pick it up and put it on the bed of the truck was another challenge. My dad is not as strong as when I was a kid so I have to fill in what he now lacks. My dad is getting old.

I enjoyed today, in more ways than you can imagine. Loved doing something I missed as a kid. Brought back memories. Knowing that just because I am a girl I can still hold it down like a guy. Not your ordinary lady. My dad always tried to teach us girls what he could about doing mechanic stuff to the cars but it never stuck.

Even though I was extra careful, today I got my jeans greased and I loved it.